“If you’re walking down the right path and you’re willing to keep walking, eventually you’ll make progress.” – Barack Obama

Today, I am tired – mentally and physically. Devoting this much thought towards myself, my body and my emotions is exhausting. Combined with the physical labors of my job, everything just hurts. It is during days like these when I think, fuck it. Today I want to give up, give in and shut down. Black out blinds are simply not enough for the noise that echoes in my thoughts. Please just let it end.

But what is the worth in that? Is that what I deserve? Life is not composed of all the times I give in to these moments. I would like to think that what defines my person is when I can stand up to acknowledge the difficulty while moving forward. I know far to intimately where I go during these times and I don’t want to be there, ever. Today, I need to remember that even when I cannot, I have to try. Not out of fear. Not out of the desire to fight. I need to put one foot in front of the other out of the love and deep respect that I would like to have for myself. If I drift, c’est la vie, but at least I can say that I tried.

That is today’s intention, to not give up, to continue, to just take a step.

– Japes


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